The Five Agreements: Don’t Take Anything Personally

Before I share with you from The Four Agreements; I just want to mention how I have noticed this one is perfect follow up to what I was whining about last month.  I need to stop taking it personally because it’s not about me if someone doesn’t want to clearly communicate with me.  It’s a gift to allow them to go.  It’s not mean, it’s not anything, it’s just noticing what I notice and noticing what I don’t notice.  What an insight for today!

Don’t Take Anything Personally

The second agreement is don’t take anything personally. Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally.

You take it personally because you agree with whatever was said. Personal importance, or taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything it about “me.”

Nothing other people do is about you.  It is because of themselves.  All people live in their own dream.

Even when a situation seems so persona, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you.  What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds.

Don’t take it personally, because the truth is that this person is dealing with his or her own feelings, beliefs, and opinions.

You make something big out of something so little, because you have the need to be right and make everybody else wrong. What you say, what you do, and the opinions you have are according to the agreements you have made–and those opinions have nothing to do with me.

Either way, it does not affect me because I know what I am.  I don’t have the need to be accepted.  No, I don’t take it personally.  Whatever you think, whatever you feel, I know is your problem and not my problem.  It is the way you see the world.  It is nothing personal, because you are dealing with yourself, not with me.

It is you have wounds that I touch by what I have said.  You are hurting yourself.

Your point of view is somethign personal to you.  It is no one’s truth but yours.  I am the excuse for you to get mad.  And you get mad because you are afraid, because you are dealing with fear.  If you are not afraid, there is no way you will be jealous or sad.

If you don’t feel any of those emotions, it is logical that you will feel good. Because you like the way you are. You are happy with the movie that you are producing, happy with your agreements with life.

Whatever people do, feel, think, or say, don’t take it personally. If they tell you how wonderful you are, they are not saying that because of you. It is not necessary to believe other people who tell you that you are wonderful. Don’t take anything personally.

The mind lives in more than one dimension.  There may be times when you have ideas that don’t originate in your mind, but you are perceiving them with your mind.  There are parts of your mind that want one thing, and other parts that want exactly the opposite.

Humans agree to help each other suffer.  If you have the need to be abused, you will find it easy to be abused by others.  Likewise, if you are with people who need to suffer, something in yo makes you abuse them.  They are asking for justification for their suffering.

Do not expect people to tell you the truth because they also lie to mantelshelves.  you have to trust yourself and choose to believe or not to believe what someone says to you.  Even if others lie to you, it is okay.  The are lying to you because they are afraid.

If others ay one thing, but do another, you are lying to yourself if you don’t listen to their actions. If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. You will find that you don’t need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.

Someone can intentionally send emotional poison, and if you don’t take it personally, you will not eat it. You will only need to trust yourself to make responsible choices.  You are never responsible for the actions of others; you are only responsible for you.

 

 

Next time with be the third agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions

In May 2012 I will be offering a five part unit through Tooele Journey on the Five Agreements.  Stay tuned!

 

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